Cinderella, she seems so easy, it takes one to know one she smiles..
Bob Dylan - Desolation Row.
Here is your basic lesson in "psychobabble" 101. Psychobabble is a term I often hear when people know I am onto something, and want to disregard it as quickly as they can. If you know me, you may hate to admit it, but I am right more often than not ("ain't often right but I have never been wrong") when it comes to human nature. Ya know why - because as an out of the closet lunatic, I can say something about us - we loonies know the human mind pretty well. Having been to the dark depths of mine, and having lived to tell about it, I have faced up with what a lot of us don't seem to want to face up to, or realize. I can't say I know myself inside out, but I know myself pretty darn well. It does not mean I am the most together or stable person in the world, but I do know the human mind. And I have come up with two essential rules of the human mind, that apply - at least 9 out of every 10 times, but not always - there is always an exception to every rule, and "my" rules are no exception to the exception. As Zappa says in Joe's Garage, "okay you asked for it, here comes the big one".
1) The mirror rule - Very easy concept to grasp, although it takes a little bit of a leap of faith. Those of us who are blind to our own human nature may have a hard time with this, but here it comes: What we see in others, is basically a mirror for ourselves. The more another person's behavior is upsetting to you, the more it is hitting home, or hitting a soft spot. This is all basic Jung, refer to projection, refer to the shadow. Unfortunately millions of us Jews were mercilessly slaughtered because we took on and lived out all the unrealized negative shadow qualities of the Europeans who projected them onto us, as the blacks have also had to experience here in this country. I am not immune to it - I have to admit, I did not have the best impression of the Mexican people until I married one and realized how great their collective spirit really is. Now - why do we do this? Well - my personal belief, is that everyone and everything is constantly trying to teach us something. We can either sit back and listen, or we can become very defensive and defiant, but either way - our asses are going to get kicked and I find that to bend over and accept it willingly works better than to try to run from it. We have two choices when we see something we dislike about another. We can ask - what is this trying to tell me, why am I getting so upset about this, what lesson do I need to learn from this, what is this telling ME ABOUT MYSELF. We can look in, ask some tough questions, and integrate our dark unconscious side into our consciousness, and although it may be a blow to our ego, ultimately it is a path to self-enlightenment and awareness. OR - we can blame that other person for being the bad person, and leave it at that, and avoid looking inside to get to the real root of our upset.
Another example - if you tell me I am a very "negative" person, chances are - you are negative - regardless of whether or not I may be (and for the records, I am negative and damn proud of it, but I am also a closet positive by nature). I have observed certain family disputes (not necessarily my family) where certain members of the family have blasted the other members, said all sorts of things in judgment and again - they are describing themselves. Consider the source - so to speak. We must be very careful when we judge others, as the judgement could easily turn the table. "And if a man among you got no sin upon his hand Let him cast a stone at me for playing in the band.". Now at this point, you are either not getting it at all and thinking I am full of it, or you are getting it - and you knew it already.
2) The opposite rule - Whatever one portrays to be the case, take the opposite of that - and that is the essence of a person. Example, someone tells you how honest they are - then - they are a habitual liar. Someone tells you how happy they are, and they are really miserable. Does this always apply - well - no. But my experience, is that if you truly are what you say you are, than there is no need to brag about it - because you already know it is the case. Some people at my old website had a constant need to describe how "well endowed" they were. My hunch is - that if you get out a microscope, that is the true size of the object in question. People have a need to appear to be something, in the eyes of others, to gain approval. The way I am - is this is it - take me as I am - warts and all, personality quirks and all. I am neurotic and insecure and I am not ashamed of it. I don't try to be anything other than what I am. If I am happy, I will smile. If I am miserable, I am not going to pretend to be happy. I am not afraid to tell you the truth (as I know it "my truth" relative to me), and I am not afraid to hear your truth about me. This site is a perfect example - people have often approached me with - why do you have to write that, aren't you ashamed or embarrassed. Well - actually - no I am not - because I am human and humans aren't perfect. (Now just apply the opposite rule here and you will find I really AM ashamed and will just not come out and admit it. Fair enough - I can be the victim of my own rule - and maybe that is true - but again, I can admit it).
There it is - everything you ever wanted to know about anyone in a nutshell. And I am not even charging you for it.
Complete side note here - Victoria has tried to go back to school and she took a very difficult nutrition class here at WNCC - she was very intimidated by it, and it was a tough class involving chemistry and biology. We just found out she got an A- in the class - and I am very proud of her!
Here is your basic lesson in "psychobabble" 101. Psychobabble is a term I often hear when people know I am onto something, and want to disregard it as quickly as they can. If you know me, you may hate to admit it, but I am right more often than not ("ain't often right but I have never been wrong") when it comes to human nature. Ya know why - because as an out of the closet lunatic, I can say something about us - we loonies know the human mind pretty well. Having been to the dark depths of mine, and having lived to tell about it, I have faced up with what a lot of us don't seem to want to face up to, or realize. I can't say I know myself inside out, but I know myself pretty darn well. It does not mean I am the most together or stable person in the world, but I do know the human mind. And I have come up with two essential rules of the human mind, that apply - at least 9 out of every 10 times, but not always - there is always an exception to every rule, and "my" rules are no exception to the exception. As Zappa says in Joe's Garage, "okay you asked for it, here comes the big one".
1) The mirror rule - Very easy concept to grasp, although it takes a little bit of a leap of faith. Those of us who are blind to our own human nature may have a hard time with this, but here it comes: What we see in others, is basically a mirror for ourselves. The more another person's behavior is upsetting to you, the more it is hitting home, or hitting a soft spot. This is all basic Jung, refer to projection, refer to the shadow. Unfortunately millions of us Jews were mercilessly slaughtered because we took on and lived out all the unrealized negative shadow qualities of the Europeans who projected them onto us, as the blacks have also had to experience here in this country. I am not immune to it - I have to admit, I did not have the best impression of the Mexican people until I married one and realized how great their collective spirit really is. Now - why do we do this? Well - my personal belief, is that everyone and everything is constantly trying to teach us something. We can either sit back and listen, or we can become very defensive and defiant, but either way - our asses are going to get kicked and I find that to bend over and accept it willingly works better than to try to run from it. We have two choices when we see something we dislike about another. We can ask - what is this trying to tell me, why am I getting so upset about this, what lesson do I need to learn from this, what is this telling ME ABOUT MYSELF. We can look in, ask some tough questions, and integrate our dark unconscious side into our consciousness, and although it may be a blow to our ego, ultimately it is a path to self-enlightenment and awareness. OR - we can blame that other person for being the bad person, and leave it at that, and avoid looking inside to get to the real root of our upset.
Another example - if you tell me I am a very "negative" person, chances are - you are negative - regardless of whether or not I may be (and for the records, I am negative and damn proud of it, but I am also a closet positive by nature). I have observed certain family disputes (not necessarily my family) where certain members of the family have blasted the other members, said all sorts of things in judgment and again - they are describing themselves. Consider the source - so to speak. We must be very careful when we judge others, as the judgement could easily turn the table. "And if a man among you got no sin upon his hand Let him cast a stone at me for playing in the band.". Now at this point, you are either not getting it at all and thinking I am full of it, or you are getting it - and you knew it already.
2) The opposite rule - Whatever one portrays to be the case, take the opposite of that - and that is the essence of a person. Example, someone tells you how honest they are - then - they are a habitual liar. Someone tells you how happy they are, and they are really miserable. Does this always apply - well - no. But my experience, is that if you truly are what you say you are, than there is no need to brag about it - because you already know it is the case. Some people at my old website had a constant need to describe how "well endowed" they were. My hunch is - that if you get out a microscope, that is the true size of the object in question. People have a need to appear to be something, in the eyes of others, to gain approval. The way I am - is this is it - take me as I am - warts and all, personality quirks and all. I am neurotic and insecure and I am not ashamed of it. I don't try to be anything other than what I am. If I am happy, I will smile. If I am miserable, I am not going to pretend to be happy. I am not afraid to tell you the truth (as I know it "my truth" relative to me), and I am not afraid to hear your truth about me. This site is a perfect example - people have often approached me with - why do you have to write that, aren't you ashamed or embarrassed. Well - actually - no I am not - because I am human and humans aren't perfect. (Now just apply the opposite rule here and you will find I really AM ashamed and will just not come out and admit it. Fair enough - I can be the victim of my own rule - and maybe that is true - but again, I can admit it).
There it is - everything you ever wanted to know about anyone in a nutshell. And I am not even charging you for it.
Complete side note here - Victoria has tried to go back to school and she took a very difficult nutrition class here at WNCC - she was very intimidated by it, and it was a tough class involving chemistry and biology. We just found out she got an A- in the class - and I am very proud of her!
posted by Zook at 8:21 PM
1 Comments:
"The white zone is for loading and unloading only"
FZ
Post a Comment
<< Home