I'm dumpin' my trash in your back yard
(We can run)
There is no statement of apathy, misery, just blatant "fuck everything" despair as someone dumping their shit on the side of the road. I walk around this breathtaking view of the Pine Nut Mountains every day with my dog, but it is hard to really take in the beauty of the mountain tops when you have broken glass from beer bottles, plastic bottles, trash of every kind defacing the land around you. I guess it is not enough that the powers that be think it is in our best interest to have their "factories belching filth into the sky" (Police - Synchronicity) and polluting our air, warming the globe for the ice caps to melt - no that is not enough, we have our own masses of people adding insult to injury. So for any of you reading this who happen to love to dump your trash into the great outdoors, I wrote this for you:
Dear polluter - "I will not condemn you" for your behavior, because you will just stick your middle finger even higher into the air in my direction than it already is. So instead I will try to RELATE to you. Gee - it must be really cool to stop at the nearest convenience store, pick up a few 24 ounce containers of your favorite poison, and get ripped in the great outdoors of rural suburbia. I imagine by the third one, you must be getting a real feeling of power - like you are "sitting on top of the world". And then - projecting your discarded bottle into the air while that alcohol has possessed what is left of your mind - that must really be a blast! But as someone who may be picking up your trash while you are going through your usual morning hangover, I have a big favor to ask of you: If you are going to get ripped - which is your right, and if you are going to pollute - which I can't stop you from doing - well - can you at least have the courtesy of buying and consuming from CANS instead of BOTTLES? I know if you are a real "connoisseur" (if I am even spelling that right, probably not) of your favorite American carbonated can of piss - you are going to tell me that with glass you don't have that stale metal after taste that you can get from a can. But come on now - by the second or third one when that alcohol is ripping through your blood stream and tearing up what is left of your liver, CAN YOU REALLY TASTE THE DAMN THING ANYWAY? My guess is - probably not. See if you dump your empty can on the ground, for one thing it is not as heavy as a glass bottle, and it is not likely to shatter into many pieces that can get stuck in some poor creature's paw - which I imagine is pretty painful. But from a purely financial perspective, out here in Nevada - we don't get a damn thing for recycling glass bottles, but we get a full 35 cents a pound for cans - after the dude at the recycling center humiliates us for about a half hour sorting through the cans making sure we are not planting extra rocks or sand in there to walk away with a few more pennies than we deserve - but the point being - I can actually load up two kitchen sized white trash bags full of trash cans and make a full TWO DOLLARS off your pollution if you just use cans instead of bottles.
I do appreciate your consideration.
There is no statement of apathy, misery, just blatant "fuck everything" despair as someone dumping their shit on the side of the road. I walk around this breathtaking view of the Pine Nut Mountains every day with my dog, but it is hard to really take in the beauty of the mountain tops when you have broken glass from beer bottles, plastic bottles, trash of every kind defacing the land around you. I guess it is not enough that the powers that be think it is in our best interest to have their "factories belching filth into the sky" (Police - Synchronicity) and polluting our air, warming the globe for the ice caps to melt - no that is not enough, we have our own masses of people adding insult to injury. So for any of you reading this who happen to love to dump your trash into the great outdoors, I wrote this for you:
Dear polluter - "I will not condemn you" for your behavior, because you will just stick your middle finger even higher into the air in my direction than it already is. So instead I will try to RELATE to you. Gee - it must be really cool to stop at the nearest convenience store, pick up a few 24 ounce containers of your favorite poison, and get ripped in the great outdoors of rural suburbia. I imagine by the third one, you must be getting a real feeling of power - like you are "sitting on top of the world". And then - projecting your discarded bottle into the air while that alcohol has possessed what is left of your mind - that must really be a blast! But as someone who may be picking up your trash while you are going through your usual morning hangover, I have a big favor to ask of you: If you are going to get ripped - which is your right, and if you are going to pollute - which I can't stop you from doing - well - can you at least have the courtesy of buying and consuming from CANS instead of BOTTLES? I know if you are a real "connoisseur" (if I am even spelling that right, probably not) of your favorite American carbonated can of piss - you are going to tell me that with glass you don't have that stale metal after taste that you can get from a can. But come on now - by the second or third one when that alcohol is ripping through your blood stream and tearing up what is left of your liver, CAN YOU REALLY TASTE THE DAMN THING ANYWAY? My guess is - probably not. See if you dump your empty can on the ground, for one thing it is not as heavy as a glass bottle, and it is not likely to shatter into many pieces that can get stuck in some poor creature's paw - which I imagine is pretty painful. But from a purely financial perspective, out here in Nevada - we don't get a damn thing for recycling glass bottles, but we get a full 35 cents a pound for cans - after the dude at the recycling center humiliates us for about a half hour sorting through the cans making sure we are not planting extra rocks or sand in there to walk away with a few more pennies than we deserve - but the point being - I can actually load up two kitchen sized white trash bags full of trash cans and make a full TWO DOLLARS off your pollution if you just use cans instead of bottles.
I do appreciate your consideration.
posted by Zook at 12:31 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home